My Adventure to Bali! | Days 0

[When the chance arrived.]

On the 6^th of December, I got this message from my mother:

“Fin ibu dinas ke bali,titip apa?”

Bali.. a potential place for answer for my latest grand puzzle in my head (which I wouldn’t tell about that to anybody) emerged. I was hoping that having one or two small paintings would do, so I just want my mother to bring me any abstract painting. But two days later, when I was lying on my bed thinking about my college assignment very lazily, came another message:

“Fin mau nyusul ibu?”

It means: I would have the chance to hunt the answer by my self.. with a brand new adventure (for I had never travelled on earth that far alone)!! My instinct said, “Grab it!” My heart said, “Bring it on!” But my head said, “Yet you still have many assignments to be done!” Aaaargh! If only I knew that there would be this exciting surprise, I would have done my assignments far, faaar.. the days before. And that day I got many things unfinished – which must be finished before I went to Bali. My mother stayed in Bali until that Sunday, and I have to go at Friday if I want to make most of my time there (I got a lecture to attend on Thursday). Rush hour again! I’ve been through many rush hour in my life for I’m the master of deadliner. But this time the deadline was different.  It has ‘pleasure’ element!

Yet this rush hour still made my head full of doubt. I forgot what day that was, in the morning, Aunty Dewi called me offering her assistance to get airplane ticket through internet, but I still have a lot of consideration. I then knew that dealing with airplane ticket was not the same as train ticket. The price could change in any minute. I didn’t know that such thing as ticket price could be very dinamic like exchange rate.

Mon Dieu! My instinct was forced to make the decision, not much time to think in a long chain. I have to decide that very afternoon. Eventually, although my head’s still at war, it ‘decided’ to trust instinct. “Kapan lagi? You used to deal with deadlines, anyway. It’s about chance!” Agreed!

Well, here’s the detail of technical fact about this adventure:

1. My mother’s room in the hotel has 2 bedrooms, thus, the accomodation (include the breakfast coupon) was meant for 2 people, but my mother occupied the room by herself. It would be wasted if there’s no one use it, heheh.. The hotel accomodation was paid by her office. It means, I could use the facilities for FREE as long as my mother stayed there (Friday to Sunday = 3 days hotel charge-free!).

2. I would spend 1 day only for my trip:

. From morning to 15.00 I have to go from my dormitory in Bandung to Soekarno Hatta airport, and waiting for the airplane.

. Next 1,5 hour I would be on the plane.

. Next 0,5 hour I would arrive in the hotel.

So, at about 17.00 WIB I would be settled. Not to mention the time zone difference. It would be tiring. As my aunt (it was her who first offered by my mother this journey, but my aunt then remembered me who lately fond of adventure) said, if I follow my mother went home on Sunday afternoon, I’d only have Saturday for fully having fun. Oh no, it doesn’t worth much!

If my mother want to pay my hotel acoomodation for one more day, I’ll take it, although that means I’ll be in Bali alone. And she did it! So I asked Aunty Dewi to help me get the airplane ticket for Friday-Monday aller-retour. I got Mandala, departs from Jakarta on Friday at 15.00, departs from Bali at 18.00. But the problem was that I have never been adventuring alone, my family worried about the time I would spend between my check out time from the hotel (12.00) and the airplane’s take off time (18.00). So my mother found me another ticket for the returning flight. She got Lion Air, will depart on 15.00, so I could directly go to the airport after check out. With this plan, I wouldn’t ‘get lost’ between the time, heheh...

That very day, Aunty Dewi booked just the Jakarta to Bali-ticket, and I soon went to BNI ATM to pay it (and so I knew how to pay airplane ticket from ATM). So did my mother for my Bali-Jakarta ticket. The next day, Aunty Dewi sent the e-ticket to my email which I soon opened and printed in Comlabs.

3. Thank God for my college assignments that need a good camera – some weeks ago I borrowed my father’s much better camera for it (before I have it in my hand, I have another father’s camera with lower quality). It means I could take many qualified photographs of my time in Bali with it! Who would have thought that my college assignment ‘supported’ me for my adventure?

4. I just knew that my mother had just bought a handycam, but it’s on purpose anyway (after knowing that she’ll sent to Bali for a week).

Alright, alright! Next treasure-hunt setting: Bali!!

Ledakan Realita .2 | bitter truths

This was the worst Ramadhan in my life: I've got a chainful sickness. One disease after another. Started from just a flu, then flu + hipotension, then flu + hipotension + air sickness = vertigo. Then after the vertigo, unknown disease which later known as hypotiroid: a sense of dizziness, like the blood couldn't reach the brain, the fatigue of the eyes, I couldn't walk as fast as my usual velocity (which is fairly fast with long steps), I could even hardly move my head from side to side, I couldn't think of anything which using 100% reason. For at least one month, I became a zombie - the fiction creature I've been cursing all my life.

But this zombie was almost completely helpless. All I could do were eating, sleeping, singing + playing piano and watching TV with maximum time 2 hours. I couldn't read or write 'cause my eye could get exhausted (even the eye movement needed energy!).

With a very weak physical body, I must leave many of my physical habits, like running and other body exercises. Not just my habits and agendas, my academic world was also abandoned for a long time.

In that moment, I found my first clue from the Owner of the Labyrinth, a shocking one, that "I'm not yet ready to die."  This remark, which I wouldn't explain the reason of it's bitterness, lead to another bitter clues, bitter truths.

There're laws of nature that I can't change, and that to change the world doesn't mean to change the nature of the universe.

Some fundamental questions in my mind finaly met the solutions, but at the same time my inner values were threatened.

This situation reminds me to the ending song of "Scratches: Director's Cut" game, the one I mentioned in "Ledakan Realita.1 | beyond the game". I found that the more correct expression of the song was not "It seems that the mystery that can never be figured out", but "I wish I couldn't figure out the mystery," as some little part in my self said.

It's not just about sadness and repressed anger, but it's more like the waste of everything, meaningless effort to find something that wasn't meant to be found - like pandora's box.

And talking about pandora's box, I think the "Uya emang Kuya" show in hypnosis part explains this better. Some people are really stupid to let their secrets spilled from their own mouth. Most are dark ones, but they revealed it shamelessly. Well, the irony is fun, anyway: yang bodoh bertingkah, yang pintar bisa tertawa, haha! They showed the contents of their pandora's boxes - dissapointing their relations with their bitter truth - and making fun of it!

But I believe however, that there's no such kind of pandora's box. If something wasn't meant to be found, then it must have been DESTROYED after all! Everything lost is meant to be found, and anyone seeks it must find it at last. No matter how confusing, how shocking, how dreadful, how hideous, how horrible, the truth is the truth. It's the 'philosopher's stone' for me.

And why do you think that truth sometimes can be bitter? I thought I got the answer: 'cause human is no angel. Human, the main actor in the universe, can do wrong. Thus the degree of bitterness of the truth goes pararel with the nature of the deeds the human have done: can be confusing, shocking, dreadful, hideous, even horrible. Of course, the truth can be sweet just as pararel as the human sweet deeds.

If truth was a bitter medicine, then human needed something that cover the taste. It can be a sugar coating, the sweetener, or a neutral-tasted capsul.

Thus, truth sometimes can be bitter, but lie can always be sweet.

Yet that's not what I experienced before this time. I'd been shown by the Owner of the Labyrinth that the truths were always sweet. I had always ended up happy in the peak of truth revealing. But now I think I'm growing up that I'm being accustomed to find that some of my treasure chests are pandora's box-like. I must accept some values I've once rejected. Accepting values is the heart's work, the underdeveloped part of my entity - that's what makes it hard.

Well, if I decide to focus on the truth seeking, then I must renounce my comfort zone. I've got to rise my level. Beyond the chaotic state of the heart, I must keep my head in order state. Despite the changing shape of the sand dunes of the world, I must keep my soul solid, my eyes undetered, and have my physical body well-armed.

In the end of the Scratches: Director's Cut ending song, the semantics could be, "Yah, sudahlah, mau bagaimana lagi?" - a sense of being forced to swallow an extremely bitter pil in order to heal. But I'll add a sentence from the Lone Dinosaur (The Land Before Time VI) to add some dose of optimism (at least it can inspire my heart to be strong):

"Change what you can, accept what you can't."

This confounded Earth...!!

"Kenapa...?"

"Iseng aja."

Kadang-kadang aku tidak tahan untuk tidak memaki:

" M E N J I J I K K A N ! ! "

terhadap dunia. Tentang betapa dangkalnya cara orang berpikir - orang kebanyakan, orang rata-rata. Betapa dangkal apa yang mereka bicarakan dan lakukan. Bumi seperti dipenuhi mayat hidup. Meaningless, purposeless, empty. Just a bunch of stupid and cowardly zombies. Membosankan. And you know what I feel about zombies? I want to kick them on the head. What a sport!

In that case, I don't care if human extinct - because it also means that zombie extinct! (But that doesn't mean that I don't care if human perish!)

Aku tidak berbicara tentang nilai religius (orang religius tidak mungkin menulis seperti ini, Messieurs). Ini semua murni masalah mentalitas dasar manusia. Saking kosongnya kepala, mereka hanya bisa menerima jawaban remeh seperti, "Iseng aja." dibandingkan, "Karena aku menemukan hartaku disini." Mereka telah berhenti bermimpi sampai-sampai otak mereka tidak sanggup memahami metafora dan menyelam di kedalaman.

"Iseng aja.", titik. Phuh! Mereka bahkan tidak lagi mempertimbangkan akal rasional. 'Iseng' itu sendiri telah dianggap rasional - to do something without any cause, or to its highest meaning possible: to do something based on simple and shallow cause.



Sejak awal hidupku aku telah terbiasa hidup dengan mayat-mayat hidup. Aku terbiasa menentang arus. Aku terbiasa menangani mereka dengan cara yang halus, membiarkan mereka menjadi mayat hidup asalkan tidak memakanku. Tapi kini mereka mulai menghisap energiku,  menggerogoti impianku, mengatur jalan hidupku. Mataku pun mulai terbuka bahwa seluruh dunia ini memang sebagian besar berisi zombie. Harapanku bahwa suatu saat nanti dunia akan berubah menjadi lebih baik semakin memudar. Inilah realita, bahwa seumur hidup aku akan terus dikelilingi zombie. Sadar-tidak sadar akan selalu ada jiwa-jiwa pengecut yang menyebarkan kepengecutannya. Orang-orang yang cari aman, berlindung dibalik tempurung kebodohan dan doktrin buta.

And if you think I suppose to respect them, forget it! Forget it!! Penakut-penakut yang tidak berani menjelajah baik secara material maupun mental sama sekali tidak layak untuk didengarkan. Tentu saja! Memangnya apa yang mau didengarkan dari ketakutan imajiner mereka? Nothing's real! Untuk apa mempertimbangkan pendapat orang yang TIDAK MEMAHAMI?! Dan untuk Anda yang merasa menjadi zombie atau drakula yang menghisap energi makhluk non-bumi ini: MEMANGNYA APA YANG BENAR-BENAR ANDA KETAHUI TENTANGKU sampai-sampai merasa berhak untuk mengatur hidupku?!!



Aku bosan hidup dalam gempuran kedangkalan. Aku bosan dengan norma. Aku bosan dengan tradisi dan doktrin. Aku bosan mengikuti "what you SUPPOSE to be is...", "what you SUPPOSE to have is...".

I want to find my own guide, my own map, MY OWN WAY! I want to have a life BEYOND this dumb world could ever imagined! I want to follow my core desire, playing the game of destiny. After all, that is one element of "what every human created for": to fulfill one unique mission that's never been done before. Kenapa tidak semua orang bisa memahami konsep mudah ini? Kenapa tiba-tiba semua menjadi panik ketika aku hanya berusaha  MENJADI DIRIKU SENDIRI? Kenapa tiba-tiba semua menjadi diktator atas nasibku which is neither I nor them know even a bit about it??

Take heed, rotten zombies! It's for your own sake. Change, or I'll change you by force - no doubt that would be hurt. Am I clear? Well, if it's not, I'll make it really simple (especially for those who have no hope of becoming human anymore): just OUT OF MY WAY or I'll smash you juicy! (Yes. All of you. As long as you're an incurable zombie. Even the ones who're closest to me.)

NB:

I'm a man of my word.

Juste une petite lettre...

Mes cher amis dans la terre,

On ce moment, je voudrais dire seulement, "Merci beaucoup." Je n'est pas une personne que veulent faire le geste d'expression. Je suis désolé de n'avoir à vous offrir que ces mots monotones. Je ne suis pas une personne d'émotion, mais ma conscience n’est pas absolument tranquille, et que le remords je ronge... car une paralysie que j'ai pour revenir de votre bienveillance. Je ne besoin de votre compréhension pour nécessité de moi-même, mais c'est pour vous, absolument.

Voici la clé: jamais, que je voudrais faire de la peine à l'autre humain (au moins pas on ce moment). Pour de sante de votre cœur, faites confiance à moi, j'apprécie entièrement tous les soucis jusqu'à le plus d'ordinaire. Cependant, je ne peux pas indique de la conduite.

Enfin, sauf les mots en français désordonné, je n'ai pas de quelque chose pour vous remercie. Veuillez excuser le dérangement que je vous cause, et accepter l’expression de mes sentiments de respectueuse considération.

-Fin

Amusement (justru) by Purposelessness

"- ...C'est simple comme Lupin.

- Et c'est tout bêtement merveilleux, s'écria Ganimard..."

-Arsène Lupin en prison, par Maurice Leblanc

[caption id="attachment_167" align="aligncenter" width="300" caption="Babykailan's cat: Baobao"][/caption]

Simply funny.

Simply cute.

Simply smile-inviting.

Simply serene, contented, and happy.

Simply 'out of the box'.

Simply comforting.

Simply orange, fat, and flat.

Simply unique.

Simply adorable.

Simply extraordinary.

Simply priceless.

Simply wonderful.

Who would have thought that a cat could bring tons of amusement to many lives by simply lying himself flat on the floor?

Another mystery of the universe, but maybe it could use a simple answer as well: "some creatures were created just to make you feel good".

Ledakan Realita .1 | beyond the game

16.43 WF, my environment's releasing the same frequency as those of the paragraph below.

"One rainy afternoon. Sometimes lightning strikes the sky. The pouring water doesn't let another noise be attended. I'm alone in an abandoned Victorian house, investigating. I can't help a sad, mysterious background song playing on and on in my head, following me through my truth searching. Any slightest sound can easily make me feel the chilling sensation along my spine. The house generates dark atmosphere - the electricity doesn't work, only afternoon gloomy light slips through the arched-dusty windows after filtered by the grey-reddish clouds. My steps sound very crisp and clear among the old woods. I shall never let my consciousness leave me."

That's the sensation I got when playing a mystery detective game called "Scratches: Director's Cut". The eeriest game I have ever played. The visual elements are magnificent: the haunted house, the paths.. but what I really appreciate is the integration of the colors. I especially love the color of the cloud, reddish grey. But it's rather connected with my memory than the objective judgment of the visual art. I soon got entangled with the 'place'. I really want to be there, to breath the cold air, to rise my head to the sheltering sky, to feel the drizzle, the dry leaves under my boots, the calm surroundings, and most of all, the hidden secrets calling to be found, the mystery waiting to be solved. Ouh yeah... I can see my hands hold on each other and my beige trench coat waving in response to the challenge of the wind.

And there's another part of the game which is just as genius as the graphic interface - the background songs. They express one common semantics of longing, sadness, loneliness.. a sense when there's nothing but dead end, emptiness, when an important enigma seems can never be figured out. Combined with the 'environment', the total atmosphere created is perfect: silent threat, suppressed scream of the truth, concentrated hidden rage, theme of the tired souls struggling for freedom.

But somehow, in my case, it also produces another effect. It's relieving - as if my heart was filled by fresh water! Back to the paragraph when I pretend my self experiencing being the player. I'll call it as fun! The whole situation - the rain, the cloud, the wind, the house, the graveled paths, the woods behind the house, the muddy fountain, the pine trees, the mystery, me being alone - would be a good treat. The calm surroundings and the rhythm of the rain resonate with my meditating frequency, as if pressing pause button to the world, and yet the hidden secrets give compliment to my adrenaline. Complete excitement!

And one day, the real wind passed me as if bringing me news. It only happened for some seconds, but enough to make my heart beat far faster. Suddenly I felt the "Scratches game" atmosphere (I didn't think about it before!). Everything around me seemed whirling as if I was thrown into another place - strange and familiar at the same time. I experienced the 'dead-end' semantics, also the mystery solving urgency. Fear and excitement clashed in one intersection, resulted in massive confusion, just like the critical situation when the self trying hard to choose between 'fight' or 'flight' within the last seconds available. Out of the overwhelmed spirit, I decided to push my pause button, let the wind finish it's task. Then I tried to decipher those 'sensational' codes from the Owner of the Labyrinth: "There's a big difference between observing and experiencing. So, do you really want it?"

I'm in my 5th Labyrinth. My tendency to interpret anything as mainly negative has been gradually descending. I took the Creator's words as neutral ones. Simply "Do you really want it?", without any intention to take me down.

With this key, I soon found the core treasure:

"If you really want it, prepare yourself well because it shall come. But if you eventually don't want it, don't waste your time 'inviting' it!"

I contemplated, I decided: "I want it!". But imagining my self really plunge into the situation made me think that one practical yet formidable weapon could come in handy. So next time, I'll investigate with a well-loaded revolver ready in my hand.

One Strange Halloween Night

[tanggal asli penulisan: 090512]



[Knock, knock, knock!]

[I open the door.]

“Trick or threat?!!”

“You mean treat, of course! Wait a minute.”

[I’m about to fetch some candies.]

“No.”

[I stop, confused, looking at one of the two kids which wearing monster costume.]

“It’s threat.”

[She answers cooly. Then the other kid with ‘insane clown’ costume adds in cheerful tone, contrast with the ‘monster’.]

“If you refuse my ‘trick’methode, my friend here will give you ‘threat’ methode. Now, choose!”

<Me in healthy state>

[I contemplate.]

[I smile.]

“I choose BOTH!”

And I live happily ever after.

<Me in average state>

[I think.]

[I choose one of them.]

And I live an unbalanced life.

<Me in ‘black hole’ state>

[I slam the door.]

[I sleep.]

[And I experience a constant nightmare about the world in chaotic state every night.]

<Me, in the PRESENT time>

[I intuit.]

“I choose TRICK!”

Oh yeah. I’m still used to Uncle Snowy’s methode. I like Uncle Snowy, but I don’t know if I could like Uncle Harpy as well…

Uncle Snowy as Vampire Illusionist

[tanggal asli penulisan: 090512]



Ok, let's see.. Where am I?

Still in the 5th Labyrinth, the 2nd big turning: “The Intersections”. Uncle Snowy had introduced me to Uncle Harpy, but the training with him hasn't really begun - since I'm not yet ready for it.

Honestly, some how I've been attached to Uncle Snowy. I've started to understand him. The more I understand, the more I'm excited. It's simply a delightful feeling to know the difference between the creatures the Owner of the Labyrinth created: "Oh.. that's why you can rarely sad!" or "Oh.. I'm like this.. you're like that.. interesting!"

When Uncle Harpy was introduced to me, suddenly I felt that my time with Uncle Snowy will soon end. Really, I started to enjoy his joke, his tales and stories, his games, his silly riddles, his plays, his circus performances, his magic tricks, his surprises, his narcissism and shameless attitude, his bouncy gestures, his spontanity, his 'out of the box' methodes, his strange phobia of getting lost, his curiosity that sometimes threats my privacy, his relieving words that make me relaxed to face world problems, his happy way in approaching life.. even his pranks!



Despite my cynical attitude to him (boy, he never get bored by this sarcastic kid!!), deep down, I'll experience a great loss if he's away forever. But the Owner of the Labyrinth heard me, and gave me good news: Uncle Snowy will be my mentor (include as my Nemesis, my sparring partner) as long as I live!!

"That's rrrrrright, Maître! So, prepare for the next surprise!! Heheh.."

Something in me said that the upcoming Uncle Harpy will also be my permanent mentor. So.. there is Uncle Snowy, and there is Uncle Harpy - as long as I know now. Fine. Anything from the Owner of the Labyrinth will always suits me.

Anyway there’s more important point I’d like to write, still about Uncle Snowy.

***

“Wanna buy a cake, Miss?”

“No, Ma’am, sorry.”

It’s unbelieveable for me to see how much improvement I’ve made about my prediction to people’s behaviors. I, a semi-autistic, absent-minded person – if I may use the word ‘person’ – is being awaken, to become more aware of the environment! All the time, I only use my instinct for sensing danger (which is now proven that it always right so I can trust it fully). Then, in the present moment, I start to see that it can also be used in predicting human gesture in more neutral way: just to know what a particular person will do in some seconds forward.

That’s why, when I walked into canteen some hours ago, I knew already that one particular person about 5 meters from me, a mother carrying baby in a cloth sling guarding a bundle of white thin plastic bag, was not part of the ordinary people around her. Her appearence was very ordinary, though: white t-shirt, long trousers (jeans?), sandals, batik cloth sling, short-black (curly?) hair, had some wrinkles upon her face. What made her different, then? Before my mind could list and analyze consciously, “gesture of expecting attention, desperate face – so explicit to me, self-doubt, sense of urgent need to fulfill material things,” my instinct already said, “a saleswoman or some kind.. or could be an imposter as well!”. But actually, it’s not the gesture that made her ‘extraordinary’ in my eyes – it’s the aura. The aura of desperation. That was the real thing that made my mind generate or ‘break down’ the gestures which made it.

I also knew that she would approach me (but this ‘knowledge’ seemed come from nowhere, I just knew it). So I walked faster with my head looking the ground. But just as I thought, she gently interrupted my steps.

“Wanna buy a cake, Miss?”

I answered with a little smile, but without stopping, “No, Ma’am, sorry.”

It was a reflex. My unconscious mind and instinct of “Run away!!” led me. Now this is the real thing that I’d like to expand. About my tired mind. About me that sometimes can also be exhausted by life tricks.



My core desire to understand life had brought me to this juncture, the spot where I was introduced to Uncle Snowy by the Owner of the Labyrinth. There’s a credo written on the signage.

“To find the Truth, you must first know what is Truth. To know what is Truth you must also understand what is Lie.”

So, here I am, with Uncle Snowy since then. But this time somehow I found my self rather dizzy with his illusions. I stop forgiving anyone who played me fool. I give no chance to every potential trickster. I’m bored with those desperate faces, pleading voices, self-pitiness.. anyone who interpret me as semanticaly “can be fooled” or at the most true sense, “can help”. I’m bored with the guessing game – since I often lost from Uncle Snowy. I rarely be the winner.

“Hey, that’s not true! Vous êtes un maître, évidemment. Le maître des devinettes! Let’s give a try:

C'est un truand
Un gentleman
Un bon vivant
Étourdissant
Jamais perdant
Toujours gagnant…?”

“L'Arsène.”

“Eh, voilà!”

“Very witty. Very verrrry witty!”

“Oh don’t be so cynical, Maître. That’s your problem: you start to lose sense of humor!”

“I won’t deny it.”

“So what are you waiting for? Come, re-enjoy the game!”

“I’m just tired. I’m bored.”

“Alright. What do you want now?”

“I want some moment to rest my mind, out of the game!”

“Very well, it’s your lead. But remember your dream, Maître. The thing called ‘your ideal future’ will be full of lie-recognizing or truth-revealing.. anyway you’d like to call! I strongly suggest that you increase the stamina of your mind – and the endurance of the heart, body, and soul as well.”

“How?”

“One of the key is just be like me: enjoy the game!”

But I’m no Uncle Snowy. I need to ‘meditate’ so I can back to the game with the joy he always talked about. And here’s the result.

I’m not the one whose life is full of suffering, surviving, or struggling with the harsh world. I don’t need to worry about material things so I can focus all my resources to develop the abstract world of my mind. I grew up in a relatively supportive environment that self-pitiness can’t easily come to mind. I don’t know what the woman with the sad face come through. If I were her, I might do the same: approaching the potential person that maybe could at least accept her, that is to buy at least one of the cakes she offered. If I were her, there’s possibility that I might take the condition (anything that triggered her to try her luck selling cake on the road) even worse: do nothing, lay down, just like a depressed, irresponsible mother. Besides, if I recalled my memory now.. she was selling something – not begging! She indeed deserves an attention.

“Look at her carefully, kid,” suddenly Uncle Harpy said. “Now that’s what I called COURAGE!”

Oh dear me.. now I regret my attitude. But my mind found the reason why my instinct so strongly pushed me to ‘escape’ from her, beside my hatred to the probability of being fooled again (since her gestures were just like those of the tricksters I knew): it’s her EMOTION that overwhelmed me! Maybe I have no sensitivity in recognizing many kind of emotions, but I can acutely sense this one: the emotion that contains EXPECTATION. The more expectation put on me, the more I withdraw.

Expectation = To cling = To parasite = To drain

That’s right, Gentlemen: Vampire!

“Hahahaha... hoho..!! Now you suspect me of being a vampire?” Uncle Snowy broke.

“I don’t suspect you. I accuse you!”

“Hohohooo... alright, alright, I admit it! My tricks this time can drain your battery – if YOU let it! But what is life without variations, Maître. And... maybe it’s time for sharpening your forgotten blade!”

“Hein??”

“Le poignard vert, mon petit Eagloo, le poignard vert!”

“...no..”

Uncle Snowy nodded, grinning mischievously, while I slowly shook my head for I can’t believe what I’ve heard.

“No..”

“Ouh yeah..”

“You’re kidding. You’re always kidding!”

“Hey, not really! At least not this time.. and YOU KNOW that. Hehe..”

Then, with his well-known ‘springy’ steps, he moved forward while whistling and singing flamboyantly, leaving me with my storming brain.. and heart.

[Uncle Snowy Singing]

“…
Gentleman cambrioleur
A gagné le cœur.”



note:
The song excerpts: “L'Arsène” & “Gentleman Cambrioleur”
The comic excerpts: Pak Janggut (by Piet Wijn & Thom Roep)

Not again...

No. Not this nihilistic delusion again!

Suddenly I feel empty, like some amount of anti-matters being blown up in one portion of the soul.

I lost my passions, my dreams, even my core desires.

Seconds, minutes, hours passed. Candy by candy melted. Not any of my chains of thought appears, so neither good nor bad exist in this intersection point of time and place.

Where am I?

Who am I?

Wh   o      a    m         I     ?

"... my head reel. I feel quite giddy."
-Lupin's cynical letter to Holmes. THE JEWISH LAMP, Maurice Leblanc

The expression above must be the case for Earth creatures - for I feel nothing. A total emptiness. No depression, no anger, no complaining. Just an undefined unhappiness: "I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!"

After the spirit-rising in the last two days, suddenly everything's vanished. Woosh-gone!

It can't be from out of nothing - must have a cause and I have been trying to figure it out. But this superintensed answer-searching activity again corrupted my time for working on college assignments. I can't do anything with my brain & heart empty!

Got the solution 70% at 15.00. Thanks to the Owner of the Labyrinth.

The rest 30%? Sait-on jamais.

And my giant college assignment? Sait-on jamais.

Labyrinth V .challenge in hide-and-seek.

Labyrinth V .system of rain:rainbow.

"Pelangiku"

(performed by Sherina)

Titik - titik hujan, masih membasahi
Kala kau menyapa, pelangiku
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"Lane Navachi"

(Lunascape)

.  .  .

She does not like me.
She does not like me.

Somebody shot her in the rainbow on Lane Navachi,
She never ran to save her own life
in a pretty cold jail.

.  .  .

Hehe...

[my favorite puzzle room in Mystery Case Files-Ravenhearst]

Oh, look at the doll's head, and the menacing eyes...

Efek Domino Kecolongan HP

1. I was voluntarily freed from responsibilities for about one month (until I got the new one)
2. No more alarm clock, I woke up by instinct
3. My eyes started being sensitive to any nearest wartel
4. My mother bought me new ones: A modem-HP
5. My mother bought a new one for her, and gave her old HP to me

:: modem-HP with free internet connection for 6 months
= bye, comlabs! see you next cemester!
= everyday web surfing
= abandoned assignments + easier browsing for assignments also
= laborously finishing assignments within the last minutes (dan Sang Pemilik Labirin dengan begitu murah hati tetap mengizinkan dosen-dosen memberi nilai diatas B - but I don't know what would be the result of the one giant assignment I'm still working on >.<)
= greedily downloading both treasures and bric-a-bracs
= become a blog freak

.= happy [if I also consider my time management]
.= rather unhappy [if I forget the time]
.= unhappy [if I get nothing after investing my time here]

:: new other HP with ergonomic design
= lots of personalization
= rely my wake up time upon external forces again
= back to my less care about environment
= take extreme measure to guard the new one

Despite some fortunes I got on the domino-effects, the main point is still that my cellphone's gone caused by my sloopiness.

Fortunately, I'm not Sherlock Holmes. How shame he would be to find one of his valuable material things being stolen. You can imagine: a fierce hunting owl with penetrating gaze, who had the well-known eyes that could look through anything like laser, got distracted (even just for a second) and something he had in his pocket moved to the hand of a thief!

Oh dear me. If I were him, I'd be really embarassed...

Ennea-cats, 5|7...

Searching for Amaranthus gangeticus?

. . .

Caress the one

The never-fading rain in your heart

The tears of snow-white sorrow

Caress the one, the hiding Amaranth

In a land of the daybreak

Reaching, searching for something untouched

Hearing voices of the never-fading calling

. . .

-Amaranth, by Nightwish

A Rose and an Amaranth blossomed side by side in a garden,

and the Amaranth said to her neighbour,

"How I envy you your beauty and your sweet scent!

No wonder you are such a universal favourite."

But the Rose replied with a shade of sadness in her voice,

"Ah, my dear friend, I bloom but for a time:

my petals soon wither and fall, and then I die.

But your flowers never fade, even if they are cut;

for they are everlasting."

-Aesop

I’ve been gathering my puzzles, but until this time, the vision of mine’s still covered with thick mists. All I see is just the siluet. What is the three-dimensional shape of my future life?

Roses are abundant all my way through the labyrinth. They’re distracting, deceiving, yet some are worth as temporary shelters when trivial storms come. But ‘temporary’ will always be ‘temporary’. I must find other elixir which can defeat the time: the Amaranth. Now, in this juncture of my 5^th Labyrinth, my heart can see it, but my eyes can’t – not yet.

What are you?

Where are you?

Mais, mes respectable visiteurs, don’t get me wrong, all the above words are just expressions, not complaints. I’m a kind of person that’ll never be exhausted en jouer a la cache-cache (playing hide and seek). Spending my life searching for answers, I never fail – never (at least referring to my experience on earth for 21 years). I believe this happen to every seekers as well. It’s just about context of time which I depend on the Owner of the Labyrinth who knows what’s best for us the hunters.

Alors mon Amaranth, nous continuons notre jouer a la cache-cache? B-)

NB:

Talking about playing hide and seek, it’s curious that I have never taken the role of hiding. Searching-finding-searching-finding, not searching-finding-hiding-found-searching…

Mais bien sure! C’est vraiment simple, evidement! Le solution est existe dans une histoire de l’éléphant et de la fourmi, plus un concept de le contexte. Voilà tout.

Labyrinth V: "The Perfect Scheme" .3.

Dear Mr. Frey,

First of all, I'd like to tell you that the letter you read by now is nothing more than an expression of my gratitude upon your acceptance to my project, my proposed solution to your particular problem.

It's very kind of you to trust that intricate puzzle of yours on my head and hands - I meant it. But maybe I made a mistake in your language. Look, what I'm going to say is, how many people trust me, a slow-headed mental tinkerer, an amateur treasure hunter, to look after their matters? Very little, undoubtedly. Then you must comprehend that it's really an honor to have a man of intelligence and ingenious leadership like you among my clients.

On top of that, I couldn't find any more pleasuring fact than to know that from your statement in our last meeting, you're willing to put my puzzle solution on to the real world - that is, to test my system. But since my solution is still on the way to its maturity, your understanding made you give me more time. The true deadline given by the outer labyrinth is within next 30 days. However, I'll make any probable effort that make me accomplish completing all the system details in the next 10 days.

I wish I could speak like Sherlock Holmes when he's assigned to catch Arsène Lupin in 10 days: "I swear it, on my honour." - then he indeed succeeded caught Arsène Lupin in 10 days. Well, I must confess that I couldn't promise anything in some exact-time for I now know that I'm even not mature enough yet to measure my capabilities of carrying out important matters.

But there's one thing to be sure: you could count on my words that I would never abandon my responsibilities at Frey's Square.

Sincerely yours,

Fin,
The Treasure Hunter

Labyrinth V: "The Perfect Scheme" .2.

failed? or just not it's time..yet?

why failed?

false metaphor? false sign?

false interpretation?

false measurement?

inadequate self-knowing?

or.. THE LABYRINTH'S GONE? ENTIRELY?! funny! ha! ha!



.  .  .

– En ce cas, Monsieur Lupin, ai-je tort de répéter que dans
dix jours ma besogne sera achevée ?

– Dans dix jours, oui, toute la vérité vous sera connue.
– Et vous serez arrêté.
– Non.
– Non ?
– Il faut, pour que je sois arrêté, un concours de
circonstances si invraisemblable, une série de mauvais hasards
si stupéfiants, que je n’admets pas cette éventualité.
– Ce que ne peuvent ni les circonstances ni les hasards
contraires, la volonté et l’obstination d’un homme le pourront,
Monsieur Lupin.
– Si la volonté et l’obstination d’un autre homme
n’opposent à ce dessein un obstacle invincible, Monsieur
Sholmès.
– Il n’y a pas d’obstacle invincible, Monsieur Lupin.
Le regard qu’ils échangèrent fut profond, sans provocation
d’une part ni de l’autre, mais calme et hardi. C’était le battement
de deux épées qui engagent le fer. Cela sonnait clair et franc.

– À la bonne heure, s’écria Lupin, voici quelqu’un ! Un
adversaire, mais c’est l’oiseau rare, et celui-là est Herlock
Sholmès ! On va s’amuser.

– Dix jours. Nous sommes aujourd’hui dimanche. De
mercredi en huit, tout sera fini.
– Et je serai sous les verrous ?
– Sans le moindre doute.

.  .  .

--ARSÈNE LUPIN CONTRE HERLOCK SHOLMES, Maurice Leblanc

Labyrinth V: "The Perfect Scheme" .1.

failed? or just not it's time..yet?

why failed?

false metaphor? false sign?

false interpretation?



.  .  .

– Allons donc, s’écria Herlock, en frappant la table du
poing, ce n’est pas à moi qu’il faut conter de telles sornettes.
Que les imbéciles s’y laissent prendre, soit, mais pas le vieux
renard que je suis.
– Ce qui veut dire ?
– Ce qui veut dire…
Sholmès prit un temps, comme s’il voulait ménager son
effet. Enfin il formula :
– Le diamant bleu qu’on a découvert dans la poudre
dentifrice est un diamant faux. Le vrai, vous l’avez gardé.

Arsène Lupin demeura un instant silencieux, puis, très
simplement, les yeux fixés sur l’Anglais :
– Vous êtes un rude homme, Monsieur.
– Un rude homme, n’est-ce pas ? souligna Wilson, béant
d’admiration.
– Oui, affirma Lupin, tout s’éclaire, tout prend son véritable
sens. Pas un seul des juges d’instruction, pas un seul des
journalistes spéciaux qui se sont acharnés sur ces affaires, n’ont
été aussi loin dans la direction de la vérité. C’est miraculeux
d’intuition et de logique.
– Peuh ! fit l’Anglais flatté de l’hommage d’un tel
connaisseur, il suffisait de réfléchir.
– Il suffisait de savoir réfléchir, et si peu le savent !

.  .  .

--ARSÈNE LUPIN CONTRE HERLOCK SHOLMES, Maurice Leblanc